Honor your Father

Imagine your shock as a little league baseball pitcher having some unknown adult coming up to offer all kinds of advice on your pitching. Perhaps you might even be a little offended, thinking if you had wanted this man’s opinions you would have asked for them. As this “expert” continues to try to cram his wisdom into your brain, you come to an astonishing realization; the expert is Derek Lowe of the Atlanta Braves.

All of the sudden you are kicking yourself in the shins (even with your cleats on) for not paying careful attention to his every word. What made the change in your response? The level of respect for the person offering the advice makes the difference. As a World Series winning pitcher, Derek Lowe is a man you greatly admire. Therefore, you listen to him with great attention.

One of the Ten Commandments calls upon us to give such respect to two very important people in our lives. The fifth commandment says, “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the LORD your God gives you,” (Exodus 20:12).

As Father’s Day approaches, it is good to consider how well we are obeying this commandment. The Hebrew word for honor contains the root idea of heaviness, or weightiness. When a person has great dignity, he is considered to be weighty.

There are two types of people that we honor. The first is like the story about Derek Lowe. Many people have great respect for him because of his amazing achievements, and skill as a baseball pitcher. When someone has unusual ability in an area, or performs nobly in a crisis event, people tend to show them honor.

The other type of people that we honor is those holding respectable offices or positions. We are right to show respect to certain individuals just because of their positions of authority. In the context of the Christian’s response to the government, Peter says, “Honor all men; love the brotherhood, fear God, honor the king (1 Peter 2:17; see also Romans 13:1-7).

Even if you find a person in the authority personally offensive, you must show him or her great respect simply because of their position. I have had to turn off certain radio programs because they were so disrespectful to our president. Catchy songs and jokes can lodge in your mind to produce a crummy attitude. If a person disagrees with some of our president’s policies and practices, they must disagree respectfully because he is the president.

Do you treat your father with the respect and honor he is due? Even if he does not act in such a respectable way, God requires that you treat him with honor just because of his position as your father (This also applies to the way we treat our mothers, but it’s almost Father’s Day, so I’m applying it to our fathers).

When we are young, the main way we honor our fathers is through obedience. In Ephesians 6, the two ideas are side by side. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth, (Ephesians 6:1-3).

Children must obey their parents fully, with only one qualification...”in the Lord.” In other words, children must not knowingly follow their father’s commandment to sin against God. Obeying God is always the right choice, if you are ever forced to choose between the Lord and any other authority (see Acts 5:29). For the most part, this exception is pretty rare.

As a person grows up, the way they honor their father changes. The transition moves from obedience to respect. Even when you are far removed from under your father’s roof, the commandment to show him honor still applies. It should make a difference in the ways you think about him, talk about him, desire to spend time with him, and even care for him in his old age.

Are you obeying the voice of God by obeying the fifth commandment? If you are still growing up in your home, are you quick to obey your father? Do you give him a hard time about doing what he tells you to do (or what you know he wants you to do)? If you are on your own, when was the last time that you showed your dad that you respect him? Has it been too long since you’ve called him on the phone?

We should be thankful to God for our fathers. After all he hand-picked the one that you got! If you do not really like the one you’ve got, you should take it up with the all-wise, sovereign God of the universe, because your complaint is ultimately against him.

We should also thank God for his grace. Through Jesus Christ there is grace for those of us who have broken God’s commandments, and dishonored our dads.

Thankfully, God also gives grace to us fathers who have not acted as honorably as they should have! Any good dad knows that his kids have turned out far better than they should have if it was just based on his perfect parenting.